Wednesday 25 February 2015

My Wanderings


In  my adolescent age like all other teenagers I developed a deep  sense of inquisitiveness for various aspects of life which persuaded me  to read books on subjects like philosophy, psychology, literature and many others.  I  was seeking answer to the queries which usually haunted my mind and books were the only source to satisfy my curiosity. In this process I lagged behind in my studies and could not achieve any outstanding performance in this field. I remained tagged with a mediocre brand.
One of the books that influenced me very much was personal psychology of Alfered Adler. I got answers to most of my teenage queries which usually perturbed me.
The full description of complexes of a person  viz.Inferiority complex and superiority complex was well explained. It was really a discovery for me at that age to know that superiority complex does not exist at all and  it is only a form of inferiority complex. A person suffering from inferiority complex only makes show  of his superiority to hide his inferiority. The inferiority can be mental or physical. A person suffering from some physical disorder will be having his other faculties sharp in order to overcome his shortcomings.
A person usually in habit of saying that he is suffering from inferiority complex is actually suffering from superiority complex (again  a form of inferiority complex) because he wants to tell others that at least he knows what he is suffering from.
Daile carnige , the writer of best seller book 'How to influence people and win friends 'usually gives reference of personal psychology of Alfered Adler.
While explaining influencing the people, he writes... I like myself cream and strawberry but when I go for fishing I usually hook my fishing rod with a worm in order to catch the fishes. The worm is the favorite of fishes.  When we have to deal with a  certain person we should be aware of his liking. Some times people prepare themselves in others subject of interest if they have to deal with them.
It is easy to become an orator but very difficult to become a good listener. Once upon a time I was invited by a friend to a party and he introduced to me to a very important client. The client gave me good lectures on his Various favorite subjects to which I listened very patiently. I had hardly spoken a word but while leaving, the client told to my friend that I was a very good speaker.
Sometimes it is better to suggest your subordinates than ordering them and it is better to win the will of person you are dealing with rather than to win his argument. By winning a argument your ego is satisfied but consequently  you loose a friend or client.
I was myself living with a guilt that I could not do much justice with my studies, but when I see my life in retrospect, I can  visualize  that at the start of my career ,although , I  was not well equipped to earn my living but I was well equipped with the art of living. I was not professionally intelligent but I had gained some worldly wisdom. I was well equipped to face the  problems  of life with patience and calmness. It was my strength, which I recognized in latter part of my career but it helped me a lot. I could stand the official as well as domestic pressures with ease.
The criterion of intelligence must  not be related only with cramming of books and passing of competitive exams but considered  with initiative, planning and quick decision making of a person.
Although I agree that wisdom comes to a  person with experiences and age  but I feel that our education system should have provision to inculcate qualities of patience, perseverance and etiquette in students  along with academic knowledge. Because some persons never grow up in life they only grow old. Moreover, I have rarely seen a fair mix of  intelligence and wisdom in a person. Both these qualities blended together can make a person perfect to great extent.

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