My Wanderings 166. Short Story No. 66 Wealth and Honour

It is an old English  maxim  that loss of Wealth is nothing as compared to loss of character or honour.  I was always   feeling guilty of my   wealth in the form of movable and immovable properties, which we left and  lost while migrating from valley of Kashmir at the time of turmoil there. But during my new posting in Kashmir in the year 1998 , it dawned upon me that we lost nothing as compared to people who never left the valley.  Ofcourse, they purchased  our houses at throw away prices. They took our jobs and immovable property. But I always  observed  something amiss on their faces which I could not forsee at that time. Though they sometimes hinted towards   it by saying, you people left once for  all , and lost only your homes and hearths, but we have lost much more  valuable than that. We had to die many deaths  during  those days  .  Moreover, we had  to  face the wrath of  both militants as well as army personell.

        In the beginning, at the time of my transfer to  valley,  I was very skeptical about the behaviour of my new colleagues ,  with whom I had to work and  who were appointed in our place  after the mass migration of our community from the valley in year 1990. But only after joining my duty in  valley,  I realised that our new colleagues, who mostly belonged to Muslim community, were not so bad as I had anticipated. They mostly  appeared to me very obedient and meticulous in discharging their duties except a  few and far between, which can not be ruled out in every type of society or organisation.

                  One of my colleagues,  whom I remember now was Aslam,  who was not so meticulous but very obedient person . He could never say no to any task alotted  to him,  whether he could complete it or not. But there are always fair mix of employees in any organisation and it's  work does not suffer  at the cost of one  negligent  employee. Aslam was very handsome  and healthy young man  , much junior to me in age and always adorning a smile on his face. He enjoyed eating  good food and meat and hardly could say no to food when offered to him. On Eid days, he would take so much meat that he  mostly  extended  his  leave from office ,a few days  more,  as he often  fell ill with Gout or any other ailment due to excessive eating . Once I also visited his house to ask about his welfare , when he did not return office for a long time after Eid  festival. During my visit to his home  I came to know that his  father had died few years ago and he and his sister were living  with their  mother only . His sister appeared to me  very beautiful and smart prima facie  but she was suffering from depression as disclosed by Aslam  to me. Aslam  further told me that he has shown his  sister to so  many doctors in the valley but  of no avail. Then I suggested   him   to get the consultation from   one of the   renowned  neuro physicians  in the matter, who was  residing at jammu like all other migrants. Aslam readily agreed to my suggestion and implored upon me to arrange for the appointment with the Doctor.

                 I arranged his meeting with the Doctor at jammu using my resources and good offices , as it was very difficult to get that Doctors  appointment within a short span  of time. One day he came to jammu with his sister. At the scheduled time I also reached to Doctors clinic  to help him. When he was called in by Doctor, I also accompanied him. The Doctor after examining his sister  advised  Aslam to meet him in the  absence of patient. Aslam asked me also to join  the meeting with Doctor. Then Doctor asked  Aslam to apprise him about the whole history of patient. Aslam first hesitated to tell the truth about the reasons behind the depression  of his sister. Then Doctor after observing  his hesitation  said to him," Mr Aslam, I have seen many patients like your sister from valley , who visit my  clinic , for treating themselves :  please tell me the whole story to enable me to treat your sister properly. You should not conceal anything from your Doctor , if you want that your patient  is treated well". On hearing these words of Doctor,  Aslam broke down  bursting  into tears and began to address   Doctor directly, 

Doctor sahab, I will not conceal anything from you for the benefit of my sister,  so that she can be treated well. When you people left the valley for good, we became the soft targets of terrorists. They began to enter our houses in huge  numbers and used  to ask us for  food, which we arranged for them happily , as we considered them  mujahids and freedom fighters.  We thought that they have  left their country and reached Kashmir with great difficulty for our liberation. After taking sumptuous meals ,they would usually ask us to send our young daughters and sisters  to their rooms for their entertainment . We most reluctantly had to fulfil their wishes as there was no other alternative left with us,  because their guns and ammunition would tear us apart within minutes. We could only hear shreiks of our women folk who were being gang raped by them in front of us. Almost every home in valley faced the same problem and nobody was able to make any complaint against them. My sister also became  fodder of their excesses and after sometime became pregnant . 

                One day my father died due to   heart failure, as he could not bear the abuses  they hurled upon his daughter and that too  in  his presence. Then I had to arrange for abortion of my sister in a far off place in jammu with the help of my some  Hindu aquantaces living there. We were not exceptions , this was the tale of each and every home in Kashmir. These terrorists were sent by Pakistan with the allurement that they will go to Kashmir which is called heaven  and can enjoy beautiful damsels  there. Moreover, hurriat also preached us that they are Mujahids who have come to free us from indian tyranny . You should not hesitate to offer them your sisters and daughters,  so that latter are purified and made sacred by them. No body could complain about these excesses . We  all could only hang our heads in shame and never discussed about the problem with each other. As we   all were helpless and let it happen for decades in the name of freedom. Many who revolted against this were either killed by mujahids or died their own death by heart failure or brain strokes. After hearing this harrowing tale from Aslam,  Doctor began to write the prescription for his sister with shaken hands. He advised Aslam all about the care he should take for his sister. Then Aslam left for Kashmir with his sister and came  back again  Jammu several  times to treat his sister with the same Doctor until I lost contact with him.

            One day after my retirement from service Aslam met me at jammu near Residency Road . When I enquired about his sister , he told me that she is alright and married now with two kids . I was very happy to know about Aslam and welfare of his sister. 

My wanderings 165. Nazmo Ghazal 43

My Wanderings 165 

My Urdu Nazmo Ghazal 43

ऐक गजल

किसी ओर के किरदार पे तजकिरा ना कीजिए

पहले अपनी शख्सियत  का जायजा तो लीजये।

कुदरत ने हर बन्दे को  खूबियौ  से नवाजा है

हर एक बन्दे को अपने हुनर का अन्दाज़ा है।

बेवजह किसी के हुनर को ना  आजमा लीजिए

किसी और के किरदार पे तजकिरा  ना कीजिए।

पहले अपनी शख्सियत का जायजा तो लीजिए।

किसी और की नुक्ताचीनी बडी आसान होती है

अपने आप पर तनकीद करना मुश्किल होता है।

कम्मिया कभी किसी की नजर अन्दाज भी कीजिए

किसी ओर के किरदार पे तजकिरा ना कीजिए।

पहले अपनी शख्सियत का जायजा तो लीजिए। 

औरो की खूब्बियू का बयान करना  लाज़मी  है

क्न्योकि हर ऐक मे कम्मियौ से ज्यादा खूब्बिया है।

और अपनी कम्मिया गिनवाने से परिहेज ना कीजिए 

किसी और के किरदार पे तजकिरा ना कीजिए ।

पहले अपनी शख्सियत का जायजा तो लीजिए ।

अगर तुम चाहते हो लोग तुम्हे अच्छा समझे

 तो अपनी अच्छाई  का कभी जिक्र ना कीजिए।

जितना हो सके अपनी बुराईया पहचान लीजिए 

किसी ओर के किरदार पे तजकिरा ना कीजिए।

पहले अपनी शख्सियत का जायजा तो लीजिए।

डून्डनी  है "रमेश' तो दूसरे की खूब्बिया डून्डये।

उसको अपनी खूब्बियू से पहचान करा लीजिए। 

अपनी खूब्बिया निखारने का उन्हे मशवरा तो दीजिए ।।

किसी ओर के किरदार पे तजकिरा ना कीजिए ।

पहले अपनी शख्सियत  का जायजा तो लीजिए ।।

                                  रमेश कौल

rkkaul.blogspot.com

My wanderings 164. Urdu Nazam 42. Raze hasrat

My Wanderings 164

Urdu Ghazal 42

Raze Hasrat

गर कुदरत ने हमारी ख्वाहिशो का ऐहतिराम किया होता

यह हादसा हमारी ज़िन्दगी के साथ कभी हुवा ना  होता

हम तो हरदम रहे किसी कुदरती मौजजे के मुन्तजिर

पर हमे मालूम ना था हम हो  जायेंगे रुसवा इस कदर 

काश हमने अपनी  हसरतौ  का  इखतिलाफ किया  होता

गर कुदरत ने हमारी ख्वाहिशो का एहतिराम किया होता

यह हादसा हमारी ज़िन्दगी के साथ कभी हुवा ना होता

हम तो हर बार रहे कुदरत की  सरगोशियो  के कायल

और मुकद्दर की गर्दिशो ने हमे हर दम किया है घायल

काश हमने इन पर इतना ऐतमाद नही किया   होता

गर कुदरत ने हमारी ख्वाहिशो का एहतिराम किया होता

यह हादसा हमारी ज़िन्दगी के साथ कभी हुवा ना  होता

हम खोदते रहे जमीन को खजाने की तलाश मे अकसर

भेच दी जब जमीन तो खजाना किसी ओरको हुवा मुयसर  

हमने जल्दी की हमेशा, कुछ ओर इन्तिज़ार किया होता

गर कुदरत ने हमारी ख्वाहिशो का एहतिराम  कियाहोता.     यह हादसा हमारी जिन्दगी के साथ कभी हुआ ना होता

शायद मुकद्दर की सख्ती ने हमे हर भार पामाल किया

दिलशिकस्ता होने परभी हमने किसी से सवाल न किया

काश हमने पहले से ही तदबीरू पे ऐतबार किया होता

गर कुदरत ने हमारी ख्वाहिशो का एहतिराम किया होता

यह हादिसा हमारी ज़िन्दगी के साथ कभी हुवा ना होता 

नाकामयाबी से लेकर नाकामयाबी तककामयाब होना हे

सिर्फ इन्सान कोअपना हौसला कभीपस्त नही करना है 

काश 'रमेश' तुमने यह पहले से ही ऐतराफ किया होता 

गर कुदरत ने हमारी ख्वाहिशो का एहतिराम किया होता

यह हादसा हमारी ज़िन्दगी के साथ कभी हुआ ना होता

                                                    रमेश कौल

My Wanderings 163. My Perception with a deception towards none. No 9. SCO Meeting at Tiangen

In recent SCO meeting in Tiangen,China  Trump was bruised, Shahnaz muzzled and Modi walked tall alongwith his old ally Putin and new friend Xi jimping. 

It was visible from their  body language, when Modi and Putin walked smiling and  holding the  hands  of  each other to meet XI jumping and sidelining Shahbaz Sharif,  Pakistan PM, who looked melancholic with his shoulders dropped in a posture of ' karwaan guzar gaya gubbar dekhte rahe'.

In the recent stand off between America and India on tarrifs , which were unreasonably imposed by the later on India, China gave some indications of coming closer to India,  which were well reciprocated  by PM Modi of india himself visiting China for attending SCO meeting and giving a thaw to new relations growing with china and making relation strong with Russia  , which has remained  all weather friend of India since 1947. The move  was also to show America that India is not going to loose Russia and stop buying crude oil from there inspite of tarrif threats of America to India. 

My Wanderings No.162. Short Story No.65. My Friend died young .

My Wanderings  162

Short Story No.65

My Friend died young.

                        While posted as Incharge international banking  Division at Jammu branch of my bank , one day, I got some time to call my friend and  colleague who was posted recently as Branch Manager at some branch in Yamuna Nagar  Haryana. When the bell of his phone rang he was not immediately available on phone . As the bell rang longer, the phone was picked up by a stranger as  I heard an unfamiliar voice of some one from the other side.

" who is it calling ?"

"I want to talk to my friend Vijay," I retorted back immediately. 

"But Vijay is no more,"  " He has committed suicide," " His body is lying in the police station." " I am the SHO of police station, Yamuna Nagar. Why don't you come here immediately and collect his body. I was gravely  shocked to hear this untoward news of my friend and switched off the phone  greatly  perplexed. I immediately phoned his family, who were already heading towards Yamuna Nagar after knowing about this shocking news. 

                          My mind traversed back in retrospection , when I first time met Vijay and later on became his fast friend. I was posted as credit officer in newly opened  loan cell of our Bank, which dealt  with all types of credits I.e commercial loans , housing and car loans.  We were two credit officers dealing exclvesely  with commercial loans only . We used to receive loan  proposals from all the branches of our bank in jammu city. Then we had to apprise the proposals , visit the borrowers place of business and property he wanted to mortgage to bank as collateral security and get the loan sanctioned by AGM, who was the head of loan cell. Then after arranging documentation and registered mortgage etc. through our lawyers , we used to disburse the loan. This was the new experiment of bank to bring expertise in loan appraising and    uniformity in documentation and to rationalise the loan process. It was really a cumbersome and hectic process to deal in such a situation , where loan proposals  started to come in bulk numbers. Moreover, it was a risky business too . When work picked up fast and it became impossible for only two credit officers to deal with the innumerable  proposals, a third credit officer was posted at the the cell to help us. He  was a young trainee officer Vijay who started working with us. He was very  intelligent and a confident person, with  gentlemanly countenace.He aways possessed  a smile  on his face. He appeared very well versed with his work in the first go. Soon we became very good friends. We could share a lot of experiences, skill and  the job knowledge to each other. We also shared our sorrows, joys and mostly the job risks and their remedies with each other. Sometimes, we could snatch some time to visit a street tea seller to take some tea or smoke few  cigarettes there and share our experiences and take tips of job from each other, inspite of a staff canteen very close to our place of work. It would give us some respite from heavy work we were alotted.  

Vijay once exposed the land  mafia operational in jammu , which  was getting mortgage loans against fake lands. We could save our skin as all of us received proposals against mortgage of those fake lands. But in some cases, we had already burnt our fingers and  they could not be   rescued  anymore then . All of us had to bear the brunt of such cases later on.

 

                    Now proceeding further,  When the body of Vijay was brought home for cremation and performing last rites , I also visited his home at jammu. He was survived by his wife and young teenage daughter, who were in extreme remorse and intence grief . The police had closed the case declaring it as a suicide.  They were submitting theories that some loans apprised by him had turned bad during his last tenure and he was under tension . They were also saying that he was pressurised by his immediate boss for increasing business of the branch. 

But his family and friends including myself, were not satisfied with this thought process , because  we knew well that he was not a person to come under such  pressures. 

                One day his daughter disclosed me that there were signs of struggle in his rented room , where police had found him hanging by the fan.  She also disclosed that a day before his death, a bank recuitment test was being conducted at the centre , where as an examinee ,he resticated a boy for cheating, who was son of some gang leader thereat , and  who later on came with some goons and killed him and made the situation like that of suicide and police also could not take due cognizance of the case and not proceed against him, as he was highly influential person having links with  Govt. authorities. This theory  appeared to be most probable against suicide theories as per the personality of Vijay. But these were all theories, however remarkable, but could not be shown the day of light due to lack of evidence or circumstantial evidences erased by the culprit or the police. But a wife lost her loving  husband and his daughter lost her  caring father. We also lost a loyal friend. We can only remember Vijay and give him tributes but can not apprehend the culprit and bring him to justice, even if he exists. God knows better why some mysteries remain unsolved. 

Zindagi rehti hai kahan , tawseeh aur tanasul ke wasayil ho jehan.

Maut rehti hai wahan, sikudane aur simatne ke masayil ho jehan.(Ramesh)

rkkaul.blogspot.com

My wanderings 161. My Perception with Deception towards none No.8. Alaska Trump Putin meeting and changing India , China relations.

My Wanderings 161

A Perception with deception towards none No.8

Alaksa Trump, Putin meeting and changing India, China relations 

             It was really a  Trump card played by putin, when at the close of Alaska meeting between the two, he  expressed his gratitude  , with a smile on his face,  to Trump for increasing Russian exports   by twenty percent during later's tenure. On hearing this dialogue  of putin trump's face turned red but he  could not reply him instantly. Putin wanted Trump to realise the double standards adopted  by him  with India for it's crude oil imports from Russia .

              Actually it was putin who stole the show at Alaska meeting by not agreeing to handover twenty percent of land to  ukraine occupied by Russia during the conflict. The Ukraine was not also to get NATO membership which was  the  main bone of contention  and later on became the main reason of war between the two.i.e.Russia and Ukraine. However,  ukraine has been given security guarantee by European countries in case of future wars with Russia. No negotiations on BRICS formation . The immediate ceasefire of Trump has been converted by Putin into peace negotiations 

          The developments of the Alaksa meeting has been apprised to Modi by Putin through telephonic conversations to enable the former to take strageic decisions. 

                         In the mean time India  has emerged as a strong country  which  has guts to call spade a spade and say No to country like America for preserving it's self intrests and framing its policies without interference of America. Actually it was America, which was making policies in it's intrest and thrusting them upon other countries. But this time India showed to the world it's assertiveness and resolve  to be treated with deference. India has evolved now as one of the biggest economies with  the highest GDP  growth rate in the world.  India can not be taken far granted now  by America any more. India will frame it's economic  policies while looking at it's own  intrests and not at the states . India is a country with biggest population in the world. India is an atomic power and space giant. India is soon becoming biggest exporter of arms. No world power not even America can stop India from progress and development. 

                   India is now framing policies to counter the effects of high tarrifs imposed by America on it. While America is forbidding India for importing Crude oil from Russia, India has started importing more crude oil from Russia ,Brazil and Iran and Iraq. India is planning to stop crude oil imports from America .India is planning to shift it's exports of steel, almuniuim  pharmaceuticals and cereals from America to Russia,  south American and African countries.

 

             Now India has started to negotiate economic ties  with China.  External minister of China wang yi visited India and had meeting with his indian  counter part Jaishankar,  the results of which appear optimistic . It is really a great relief for India as China has agreed to lift curbs on export of rare earth minerals, fertilizers and tunnel boring machines to cater to India's  needs. Both sides also agreed to reopening border trade through designated trading points namely Lipulekh and Nathula near Ladakh .On Tiwaan Jaishankar said that like many other countries ,India follows a one China policy , but trade with Taiwan will continue. China has also agreed to early solution of border disputes with India and terror concerns of india. Now PM Modi is also visiting China soon to attend SCO conference. But India needs to observe caution in relations with china due to past experience of India with china. 

                    The reason behind the Trumps grudge against india is not it's  Russian crude oil imports but India's not agreeing to the issue that it  was Trump who made ceasefire between India and Pakistan at the time of Operation Sindoor,  thus dimming  the chances of Nobel peace prize for him. 

               Lastly ,India does not need to close all the ties with America but keep some options open to negotiate with it on equal terms and standing . With assertiveness India also needs some accommodative ness within reasonable levels ,while dealing with America. 

Rkkaul.blogspot.com

My Wanderings 159. Shiv Astuti No.2. Om vyapt charachar bhav Vishesham

My Wanderings 159

Shiv Astuti 2

Om vyapt charachar bav vishesham 

I have made an amateur attempt to translate Great Abhinav Gupt's captioned Shiv astuti in kashmiri, orginally written by him in Sanskrit.

Abhinav  Gupt was a great scholar of Kashmiri Shivism, who has contributed substantially  to this great legacy of ours.

It is said that Abhinav Gupt has left this mortal world by entering in to a cave near Beerwah, Kashmir alongwith his twelve hundred deciples while singing this Shiv Astuti. Every Kashmiri pandit is required to understand and remember this Shiv Astuti by heart.

युस थलि थलि छु सारिसय  बृम्माहडस मन्ज रोजान

युस ग्यान रुप छु, कुनुय छु, अनादि अनन्त छु आसान

युस भैरव स्वामी छु बेय युस अनाथन शरण छु दिवान

भु छुस तस शिवस पजि मन सीती  नमन करान

यी  बृम्माहंड छु चोनुय रुप आसान

यि छु मे चानि अनुगृहि सीत भासान

मगर चुय  छुख म्यैन आत्मा आसान

तवय छु ये बृमाहन्ड मे पनु नुय रुप भासान

यौहय छु मे पनुन अनुभव वनान  

दोख त मोह पृकट करन वालिन करमन मन्ज  

फंसेमित लोख छी यी वनान

संसार छु, ही नाथ, चोनुय रुप, तवय छिन संसारकेन

दुखन तिम  खोचान  

यलि चुय छुख सौर्य, चानि वराय छुन कान्ह आसान

तेलि कान्ह डर छुन चानेन भक्तेन भासान  

ही यमराज क्रोध सान कराल नजीरि मे कुन म  आस

वुछान 

बु छूस हर सात शिव चिन्तनस मन्ज मन सान  लगिथ आसान

यमि सीवाय किन भ भैरव शक्ति सीत छुस जुडिथ

चानि करूध कराल नजर हेकि न मे केन्ह ति  करिथ  

ही शिव सोरय बृम्माडं छु  चोनय सोरूप  मे भासान

यी जानिथ छु अग्यानुक अन्धकार मे खत्म गछान  

तवय छुस न भ यमराजस या भूत पेशाचस केन्ह ति खोचान.

ही नाथ चेय  छुय म्येन नमस्कार भारम्भार आसान. 

ही शिव चानेन सत्गोन रुपकेव पृवव हंदि बहान 

सारी बर्माडक तत्त्व त बेय पदार्थ छी हरकतस मंज ईवान

ईथयकनि अम्मी ग्यान कि पृकट  गछन सीत छुस भ शरदायि होन्द अमृत चवान

बेय योहय चोनुय सरूप छुस पननि आत्माय मन्ज अनुभव करान 

यलि शरीरस ताप बडावुनच कष्ट दशा छुस मन सीत मेहसूस करान 

तमी सात छु मे चानि अनुगृह सीत प्राप्त अकि अभेद वृष्टि होन्द उदय सपदान 

यमि की प्रभाव सीत छुस न भ कान्ह कष्ट अनुभव करान 

यलि वृत दान या तप सीत छु यमि संसार केन दुखन होन्द  नाश सपदान

शिव शास्त्र की चिन्तन मात्र सीत छु मनस मन्ज अमर्त्य धाराय बहान

ही शंकर चानि दर्शन सीत छु म्यान रुम रुम गाहे नचान त गाहे ग्यवान 

अभिनव गुप्त छु यि शिव असुत्त्ती  संवत 68 पोष कृष्न पक्ष दहम  दोह ग्यवान

यमिकि गवुन या उच्चारण  मात्र सीत छु शंकर खेनस मन्ज तार दिवान  

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